This was submitted anonymously to my website. I felt it was important to share.
Kai
Hello,
Here is my submission of my take on the wife school scam.
You can post this. Please keep my name hidden. Thanks so much for your time!
Just some of my thoughts on the baffling chain of events that have unfolded and are continuing to unfold before my eyes via social media…
To start, be advised that I have never been affiliated with, or participated in any aspect of the wife school program.
I bumped into the wife school/Roots Of Royals founder’s Facebook account via a post that someone on my timeline had shared. After reading the post I started following the page, like many. I followed the account for more of a laugh and to share the posts with my friends, especially married ones and ones with children, to see if they agreed with, understood, or even heard of some of the teachings and philosophies shared on the page. (Needless to say, some very interesting conversations started among us).
I observed that some of the things written made some good sense and some good points were made. Other stuff, not so much. Like anything- books, articles, teachings, lectures, etc, you take what you feel is useful and discard the rest. Over time for me, however, the information shared on the page didn’t make sense for me nor fit my lifestyle, beliefs, or ideologies. In fact, there were major clashes. I just followed on, never engaging, didn’t even send a friend request, and definitely didn’t join the “movement.” Cause, it wasn’t that serious to me. Long story short, I am no stranger to seeing the floodgates of drama unfold on social media, and whatever image is portrayed just be uncovered, dissected, and exposed. You can’t fool everyone. Characters once admired (or tolerated at the least) become questionable. This is not the first time that I’ve seen someone portray a whole “desirable” lifestyle on FB, only to find out the whole shit is a boldfaced, bonafide lie! The exposure and uncovering of this whole WS “movement” has to be one of the craziest, mind-boggling displays of social media insanity that I have ever seen in all my years of dealing with social media platforms.
It seems like the WS cult leader (now a much appropriate term at this point) would have been better off just writing a book, sharing tips for successful and relatable marriages, discussing her travel adventures, maybe giving some financial advice, family advice, building a following and just running a legitimate business. But no, she chose to run some scammy for profit hustle, out here telling Black women they are basically nothing unless they are married, not handling product distribution and money issues properly, tricking women AND men into some glorious lifestyle only attainable by paying her for it. Selling information that people can find themselves for free. You have a narcissistic criminal out here with crunchy hair preaching about being oh so feminine at all times, ignoring the fact that everyone has feminine and masculine energies. Overall conducting herself mainly in masculine energy (according to what her teachings insinuate).
I am beyond tired of all the messages targeted at Black women that, if you are single, childless, and simply living life that something is wrong with you. That if you are a working parent, you are a disgrace. That BW, “single parents” and “masculine” women are the cause for the downfall of Black men and the Black “community” overall. It’s the fault of BW that BM portray less than desirable behavior in all aspects of life, especially relationships and family building and maintenance. That the answer to everything is ‘You must be married”. The hell with education, self-awareness, and manifesting the type of lifestyle that you want as a woman. The hell with a career, self-love and self-reflection. The end goal, end all be all for a woman is to wrap yourself up in a man. Otherwise, your existence is meaningless. You mean nothing. You have no voice, and no identity unless you are up under someone. Women, you are not valid unless validated by a damn man.
There isn’t anything wrong with being married, pursuing a relationship, or companionship. But at this expense? Listen, I could go on and on but I’m exhausted…
I will just say this.
Black women, at NO time are you required to lose yourself, neglect yourself, or pay some unstable walking contraction in a woman’s body thousands of dollars to find love, be loved, and have fulfilling relationships and successes. Stop listening to extremist cult leaders and anyone similar. It is completely Ok to think for YOURSELF. The only one that needs to validate you is YOU. I guarantee that being in a relationship will not sure [solve] any of the internal and external shit that you need to address.
It is OK to put yourself first and look out for your best interest. These are things that should never be in another person’s hands!! Get the self-care and healing that you need, and do NOT be ashamed. At the end of the day, no one seems to care about a BW enough. I know there are some who simply won’t follow this advice and keep on getting caught up in this like this WS cult and listening to people who hardly have their best interest at heart. At best, the only thing I can hope for those individuals is that a message like this gets to them and they act on it.
If you have been a victim of Ro’s wife school please share your story.
~Kai
Follow me: @KaiNicole on Twitter, @KaiFlyMommy on Instagram. And, buy the best dating book for women, Date Like A Woman!
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