I no longer live in Washington, D.C. but being that it’s my hometown I stay connected to the happenings around town. This morning on, “The Fam In The Morning” WKYS, one of the co-hosts of the show, Danni Starr, the only woman co-host, was blindsided by her two co-hosts, Quicksilva and DJ 5’9, when they brought on a woman who Danni had declined to hire as a babysitter earlier this week.

Listening to this interview I thought of a multitude of issues that were happening simultaneously. They need to be addressed, especially given that today is International Women’s Day and so many of the issues in this interview have to do with sexism and how sexism operates.

Let’s begin with the fact that Danni as the only woman on the morning show team was ganged up on and blindsided by her male coworkers. This would have never happened to a man. The fact that her coworkers felt that it was ok to set her up for the sake of ratings is one of the ways that women are treated differently from men, especially in the workplace.

The pure lack of respect for her position on the show is something women often face in their jobs. Many times men feel it is perfectly ok to disrespect a woman, who is in an equal position or higher, because sexism allows men to not respect a woman’s authority. These men betrayed their coworker by not even warning her that they planned to bring someone on the show that Danni had had a personal interaction with. They also thought it was perfectly ok to plan the show, a show that Danni is an equal part of, without her input.

This type of behavior, where men on a team feel that they can move forward without their female team members’ input, is repeated across many industries, not just radio. It is extremely sad and disgusting that this type of behavior is allowed to go unchallenged but since we live in a male dominated culture it’s practically the norm.

Dominating sexism loves to place women in positions of competing with one another. This interview with the babysitter was created for the sole purpose of pitting two women against one another, which is exactly what a sexist society wants women to do. Women are always told to focus on another woman as a rival, and to be honest, it works. It’s the “divide and conquer” technique, because as long as women are fighting with one another women can be controlled. “Sexism has taught women from the time they are little girls to see each other as competition. We are taught this because women united together are very powerful. As long as women are competing with one another sexism maintains its control.”  – Date Like A Woman

Women are also taught to see other women as rivals for very trivial things, in this case, because the “babysitter was pretty.” A huge issue with sexism, is the fact that women are taught that their only value is in their physical appearance. The very intention on the part of her coworkers to bring this babysitter in to be interviewed was to present her as a rival in Danni’s marriage, which brings me to the last obvious issue.

Sexism loves to place blame on women for men’s behavior. Danni has the absolute right to choose who she hires in her home. She does not have to give a reason. It is her choice and any reason is valid. However, this premise that a woman being hired into a married couple’s home can be “too pretty” and cause “temptation” for the man is repugnant. Men cheat because they want to.

While I do understand Danni’s reasoning, because she has survived infidelity and she lived through her father’s infidelity, it is unfortunate that even though the behavior of her husband and her dad are fully their own, Danni is still taking on the burden of their behavior by eliminating “competition.” Women should under no circumstances feel that they have to protect their marriages. Men should be held accountable for their actions. The fact is no woman can steal a man because, “Men go willingly to where they want to be.”Date Like A Woman. It wouldn’t matter if the babysitter was pretty or green or purple. If her husband wants to cheat on her, he will.

Now, the absolutely most disappointing thing about this interview was the fact that today is International Women’s Day. Instead of Danni’s coworkers truly honoring her presence and uplifting her, they decided to make a true debacle of their own show.

I had to take time to write this. Hopefully, by speaking up about important issues like this we can ensure that women will not have to deal with this type of behavior in the future.

~Kai

Follow me: @KaiNicole on Twitter, @KaiFlyMommy on Instagram. And, buy the best dating book for women, Date Like A Woman!

(Photo credit: https://kysdc.com)

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