Thanksgiving is upon us which means many of us will be with our families. This year the most dreaded topic of discussion will probably be the current political climate. However, for many women Thanksgiving is the holiday that brings out the most scrutiny from family about your current relationship status, especially if you are single. This can cause a lot of stress for many women because there’s nothing fun about your family being all in your business.

Let’s be honest though, the family pressure during the holidays is not limited to single women. It doesn’t matter if you are single or not, as a woman someone somewhere will always have something to say. When you are single they ask, “When are you going to get a boyfriend?” When you have a boyfriend they ask, “When are you going to get married?” When you are married they ask, “When are you going to have a baby?” When you are already married with a child they ask, “When are you going to have another baby?” Women seriously cannot win.

Our society is so steeped in sexism and patriarchy that when women don’t do what society deems as “acceptable” people feel they have the right to judge how you decide to live your life. Especially family. Dealing with your family badgering about your dating life can be overwhelming and stressful and can send you spiraling into a depression of self-doubt.

So how do you survive this Thanksgiving? I will borrow some great words from Tracee Ellis Ross’ speech at Glamour’s 2017 Women of the Year Summit “My life is mine. My life is mine.” Remember other people’s expectations of you don’t matter. Your life belongs to you. You are not your current dating status. Your life doesn’t end or begin because you have or do not have a boyfriend. Yes, they may judge you. However, you can politely remind them that your life is yours and continue to enjoy your Thanksgiving meal.

Remember, if you are happy, keep your happiness. Never let anyone tell you how your dating life should be. Dating should always be on your terms and not based on family expectations.

So please enjoy Thanksgiving. If your family tries (dares) to judge you about your dating life, politely remind them to worry about their own relationships’ status!

~Kai

Follow me: @KaiNicole on Twitter, @KaiFlyMommy on Instagram. And, buy the best dating book for women, Date Like A Woman!

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