Everyday it seems there is another “complication” to dating, the “Dutch” date being a recent topic of conversation. The Dutch date is nothing new. In fact, when you are a broke college student, going Dutch is pretty much the norm. However, now that women are earning more money than ever some men are starting to get more and more vocal about how “expensive” dating is and that more women should be more willing to go Dutch.
Now, I don’t see anything wrong with a woman paying for dates…if she asks a man out. In fact, as I have stated before, the rule is if you ask someone out, you should pay for it. No exceptions. However, this Dutch date thing is a bit more complex.
Should women accept going Dutch on a date? Honestly, I think that would be up to the individual woman. The real question here is, “Are men actually stating when they ask women out that they want to go Dutch?” If they are not, there is definitely a problem. Of course, there is absolutely nothing wrong with going Dutch as long as both parties agree to it before the date. Personally, I would find it offensive if a man asked me out and then when the bill came, he asked me to split the check. That is just a breach of protocol. And, there would be no second date!
I would not accept a Dutch date as a first date although I would respect the man who asked me to go Dutch. That shows he is being up front about how he would like to date. I simply would not date a man who would do that; that’s just me. Not that I actually mind paying for a date, however, if you ask me out I have no plans to go half with you. The way I see it, Dutch dates are something you save for later in the dating process when you are heading into more of an exclusive dating situation.
Basically, the whole thing all comes down to men being honest and up front about what they would like to do first. Ladies, if a man asks you to go Dutch and you don’t mind, go for it. If you do mind, decline. Either answer is ok. And fellas, if you want to go Dutch, say that in the beginning. If a woman accepts your Dutch date invitation, well, you may have someone pretty special on your hands. So, don’t mess it up!
~Kai
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