Over the last several years doctors and researchers have been studying the impact of loneliness and social isolation on our health. Some studies show loneliness to be a bigger health risk than smoking or obesity. In the last months several articles have appeared highlighting these studies. The primary problem with these articles, however, is that many people seem to believe that single and lonely are synonymous. While it’s true that “actual and perceived social isolation are both associated with increased risk for early mortality” (Forbes) single does not necessarily mean that you are also lonely. In fact, being single often allows you to interact with more people than you would if you were in a relationship.
It is important for single people to understand that the absence of a romantic partner does not mean you are doomed to die of loneliness. While one may believe that having a romantic partner is the solution to loneliness, people can feel even more isolated in a relationship, (often married people report feeling lonely). It is also important to remember that romantic partners are just one type of relationship. Family and friends are also important relationships. Social isolation happens when people do not make important personal connections with people. Those connections do not have to be with romantic partners. Forging great friendships or spending time with family are ways to avoid feelings of loneliness and isolation. It is also important for women especially to remember that women benefit greatly from female friendships. Women generally provide more emotional support to one another than romantic partners.
People who spend extraordinary amounts of time on social media feel greater amounts of loneliness and isolation. While social media can “feel” like a connection to others it is actually “ambient intimacy” and not a real connection. Social media can make you feel that you are living a much worse life than others, which contributes to isolation. If you ever find yourself feeling extremely lonely one of the best things you can do is simply log off. Spend time with your family and friends instead.
Always value family and friends. They are usually the constants in our lives. Avoid immersing yourself in “loneliness” articles that may cause you to beat yourself up for being single. “Being single is not a disease or debilitation. Being single is just fine.” – Date Like A Woman.
~Kai
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